Out of Whack
Jeff Strand
Language: English
Pages: 248
ISBN: 0759945020
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
From the author of How to Rescue a Dead Princess comes Out of Whack, an outrageous comedy about friendship, love, following your dreams, and other really scary stuff. Seth Trexler has two goals in life: to find success with his off-the-wall sketch comedy troupe, and to win the girl of his dreams. But when you suffer from brain-erasing stage fright and an incredible female-phobia, those goals can be a bit tricky to attain. With his best friend Travis at his side, Seth struggles to overcome his fears (along with the 2,873 other roadblocks in the path to success) in this hilariously demented yet heartfelt tale. But don't read it for the laughs. And don't read it for the heartfelt parts. Read it for the sex scene, which proves that even if you're filled with ravenous animal passion, trying to dramatically tear off somebody's underwear can only lead to wedgies.
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you willing to prove it? Then enter the blah blah blah...all styles are permitted, from a stand-up routine to a hilarious song you want to perform. No more than five minutes, please. It will be held September 15 at blah blah blah. The winner at each school will get to perform in the finals at New York State University blah blah blah.” “I’m doing it!” I said. “I was thinking we could do a collaboration,” Travis said. “We could write a skit to perform together, like we’d kinda sorta planned to do
offered my opinions, most of which related to Travis being a wanker. Laura knew her lines perfectly by the second rehearsal. Travis had his down by the fifth. There was no doubt, however, that both of them were immensely talented. This was going to work. Laura was determined to not let our being officially boyfriend and girlfriend interfere with her duties as a student and a comedy troupe member. I swear, she spent more time studying and doing homework than I spent exhaling. When she wasn’t
attending classes or doing other school stuff, she was either sleeping, rehearsing, or eating. I hadn’t been invited to join her in the process of sleeping, and while rehearsing we were all business—not so much as a one-lipped peck on the cheek. But we ate most of our meals together, and we did reserve short blocks of time for testing the resistance of our mouths to high-powered suction. It was a good thing I didn’t have any lines to remember, because they would have come out “I Laura am Laura
that Seth be gradually given acting duties.” “I’m okay with that,” said Travis. “Okay, Seth, staple your butt in front of the computer. We need skits!” * * * [ The stage is now serving as Jennifer’s apartment. She’s applying some makeup as the doorbell rings. She hurries over to the door and answers. ] CHARLES: Hi. You must be Jennifer. [ He’s tall, dark, and handsome, just like that massively studly actor who plays him, Travis Darrow. His clothes are nicely tailored and fit all the current
“Okay, definitely,” said Laura without conviction. “Seth, I just want you to know that I lov...that I want you to be happy.” She leaned over the table and gave me a gentle kiss on the lips. “Do you need me to drive you to the airport?” “Yeah, that’d be nice.” “Let me know when your plane is leaving and all that.” She closed the lid to the pizza box and brushed off her shirt. “I need to get going.” “Where do you have to go? I thought we could spend the afternoon together.” “I would, but I have