No One Said It Would Be Easy: A Husband's Journey Through His Wife's Battle With Breast Cancer

No One Said It Would Be Easy: A Husband's Journey Through His Wife's Battle With Breast Cancer

Ken Churilla

Language: English

Pages: 256

ISBN: 1939447798

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


NO ONE SAID IT WOULD BE EASY: A Husband's Journey Through His Wife's Battle With Breast Cancer is the gripping story of a man who lost his wife to breast cancer. Told through his eyes, the reader sees everything both medical and personal, the way he experienced it and how he reacted to the various experiences and situations at home, at work, in his mind, and in his private time. It recounts the heart-wrenching journey through his wife's fight for survival in this well-written and brutally honest chronicle that stands as a companion guide for all men caught in this war of all wars. The Do's, Don'ts, and I Don't Know's are all captured here in a vulnerable tale that offers to shine a light in such inevitable darkness. NO ONE SAID IT WOULD BE EASY takes the reader through all of one man's thoughts, reactions and emotions through it all: her initial diagnosis, treatment, the declaration of her being cancer free, her relapse, treatment, decline, death, burying her and then moving on in all facets of his life as a man and a father. It tackles everything from the medical procedures to the shift of balance in the household going from equal partners to provider and caregiver. It also tackles the details of his personal life that only a man going through this will know: things such as the intimacy (both sexual and romantic) between him and his wife, how he dealt with his feelings of anger / loneliness / faith, raising a son and two young daughters (after all, what man knows about bras, make-up, hairstyles and boys), to moving on after she passed. It also goes beyond the burial from rearranging the house, when and what he did with her things, dealing with his grief and ultimately developing new relationships; all the while executing the same tasks for as a father for his grieving children. Designed to be a helpful tool for men going through this journey or who have already experienced this life changing event not as a 'self-help' book, but in much the same way that athletes watch game tape. The disease is the common opponent shared by the reader and will attack the reader in many of the same ways and in some other ways differently. NO ONE SAID IT WOULD BE EASY allows the reader to see inside the mind and life of a man who literally walked in their shoes, how he reacted to various situations and either compare their actions or prepare them for some of what might be coming.

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knight in shining armor again, but I had to. Looking back, I have a feeling Gina was looking out for us more than she was for her with that decision. Logistically maybe she felt it was too much time away from home as all of the treatment could only be administered at the MD Anderson facility. Instead, she said she felt more comfortable doing the treatment of standard chemo with Taxotere at home in Illinois. Dr. Linden accepted her decision, but he wrote up a plan for us to give to our oncologist

starting to feel like a single dad. Worse yet, I was already starting to feel lonely. 36 MERRY CHRISTMAS WITH LOVE CHRISTMAS EVE FINALLY CAME and I was fighting to feel festive. As the day crept closer, my sisters and I talked about what the family was going to do. Traditionally we had Christmas Eve at my sister’s house. We settled on the fact that the easiest thing to do was to still have it there. This way Gina didn’t have to do anything to get ready for it and in her mind, it would be

could do was stand in the kitchen and kind of look around, trying to decide what to do first. My mom called to check in and gave me some good advice – don’t sink in this. She knew these first few days were going to be hard and foreign to me and as a concerned parent and friend, she didn’t want me to crumble beneath the silence of it all. She was right. There were things I had to get done and things I needed the kids to get done. Getting them back into school was the first thing and that went

wake up to this. It was true, but that’s where I stopped with my explanation of locations. No need to bring Gina into the moment anymore than she already was. We giggled like kids as we went down the stairs. As we fell into the couch my mind began racing again. I was excited as hell but nervousness ran a close second and guilt wasn’t far behind. Was I going to be able to perform? Could I please another woman at this point? I hadn’t been with anyone other than Gina in decades! It was everything I

waving the white flag, but every time I started to feel the pangs of embarrassment, I knew deep down it was the right thing to do. Emotionally for me and for the girls, there was no way I could swing waking up Christmas morning in our house. Not after everything we had gone through and surely not after the Christmas we had last year when we gave Gina that video. When I told the girls about my plan, they were reluctant at first. They wanted to be home and I can understand that. It took a bit of a

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