Internet Short Stories and Jokes
Harvey Fushman
Language: English
Pages: 654
ISBN: 1413430651
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
This is the first book about the Internet that has gathered and organized all of the myriads of jokes and fables that have circled the globe over phone lines. Over fifteen years in the making the author has compiled and edited little facts and big ideas that poke fun at everything and everyone. All professions and all peoples are included. Here are a bundle of laughs and tears, interesting facts and irreverent and informative stories. Read it at home or at a party. Bring it to your place of work to relieve the stress or brighten the monotony. Enjoy it as you would a meal; little bites or all at once. Memorize the facts to impress your friends and be prepared with a timely joke or story. It is all here in one wonderfully entertaining book.
Mr. K's Book of Really Nasty Jokes
Straight to Hell: True Tales of Deviance, Debauchery, and Billion-Dollar Deals
unable to find the beautiful ilver gravy ladle . You don't suppose he took it. do you'!" ·n1e pri est sai d. "well. I doubt it. but I' ll write him a letter j us t to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: " Dear Fathe r. I' m not ~aying that you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house. and I' m not sayi ng you 'did not· take a gravy ladle. Butt he fact remai ns that one has been missing ever since you were here." 91 HARVr v H t\IIMA everal days later the elderly priest received a Jeuer from the
"excuse me Father, but do you mean her and her FIRST husband, or her and her SECOND husband'!" The priest says, "no, I mean her legs." Mission ary In Africa A missionary gets sent into deepest Africa and goes to live with a tribe there. lie pends years with the peopl e. teaching them to read and write and the good Christian 100 l l'lli.IUWI SIIOKI STORIL~ ANI) )OKI '> ways of the white man. One thing he particularly stres~cs is the evil\ of M:Xual "'"· Thou mus t not commit adultery or
someone would have a smart comment Finally, everyone had gortcn off except for this little o ld lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sonny. mind if I ask you a question?" "Why no Ma'am," said the pilot. "what is itT' The litt le old lady said, "did we land or were we shot down?" 106 ) Nll RNII SIIOR r S lOR II S AN OJOKI~ Aflcr a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight Allcndant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen. please remam in your scats until Capt. Cra~h and the Crew have brought
must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (OK, like THAT makes sense . ..). In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman 's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only sec their reflection in a mirror. (Almost OK). Muslims arc banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. lllis also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all
came into the house and lifted up the nightgown and began pening her all over." reports the parrot. "Oh No!" the guy says. "Then what?" "Then he lifted up th e nightgown, got down on his knees and began to lick her body, sta rting with her breasts and slowly going down and down ..." The parrot pauses for a long time . ''What ha ppened? What happened?" says the frantic guy. "I don' t know," says the parrot, " I fell off my perch." Sexy Parrot An old man was si tting on a bench at the mall. A