44 Horrible Dates

44 Horrible Dates

Eddie Campbell

Language: English

Pages: 256

ISBN: 1402267479

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


"This book is a hilarious romp of true life (unfortunately). Read it and prepare for your next date."—James Van Praagh, New York Times bestselling author, Talking to Heaven

"Every story is the truth and every truthful moment is a hilarious journey! It's as if you're listening to your best friend at a coffee shop and watching a stand—up take command of the stage. You won't be disappointed as you travel this refreshingly funny road of 'horrible dates!'"—Debra Wilson, actress/comedian, MADtv

"Eddie's book is an emotional catharsis for anyone who has ever come home from one horrible date and wondered, What the hell was that? This book is laugh–out–loud hilarious and extremely well written."—Chad Allen, writer, producer, actor, activist

What I have to tell you in this book will seem almost unreal. But you are going to have to keep reminding yourself that these are actual real dates.

  • For everyone who can empathize and knows what it's like to be on at lease one crappy date, this book is for you.
  • For everyone who wants that dinner back or sat through a boring, horrible movie only to determine that the person you were with was a complete and utter tsunami, this book is for you.

For everyone else, buckle your seat belt and turn off your phone, because a massive car wreck is about to begin.

Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom

Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray (Completely Revised and Updated)

Introducing Psychology of Relationships: A Practical Guide

Les décisions absurdes (Tome 1)

Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

to have a lot in common. He liked hiking, rollerblading, and being outside. He was close to his family and had a really close bond with his sister. These were all things I completely identified with. This is the point where you start to analyze and imagine scenarios of why someone like Craig is still single. He had said he didn’t go to bars. He hardly ever went out. He’d had a long-term relationship that had broken up two years earlier, but they had remained good friends. My standard get-to-know

grab a bite to eat or a drink afterward and would get the chance to talk then. Where and how we met is dull. We met through my friend while we were all at a bar one night. We talked on the phone once before our date. We went to see Babe: Pig in the City. It was replaying in a small theater in Westwood. Babe, by the way, is one of the best movies I have ever seen, and I see a lot of movies. We arrived at the theater and bought some snacks. I love popcorn during a movie. We were able to talk

just to see if it was anything like the movie Twister. It was not. As a child he created his own language called gucci mala, which he shared only with a Mattel doll named Talking Cynthia. As a teenager, Eddie was in a car accident with his best friend Liora. He went through the windshield and walked away without a scratch. He is convinced he has nine lives, but eight of them are used up. Eddie has an associate’s degree from Santa Monica College. He has a bachelor’s degree from USC Annenberg

though, requires a cell phone call or text message. If someone doesn’t have a cell phone after the year 2000, they might not be from earth and are as un-datable as someone who wears still Ed Hardy–bedazzled clothes. Thirty minutes late with no phone call, and you may as well not show up for the date unless you got into a car accident, the air bag went off, and you’ve had to spend the past twenty minutes filling out insurance papers at the hospital. Finally, at 8:45 p.m., Roger called from the

video game, he would already be at Level 10, have a million points, and four spare lives. If I were Pacman, and he were a ghost, I would let him catch me and eat me. When he opened the door to his apartment, I was extremely disappointed. His apartment was beautiful and immaculate. You could eat off the floors. I was disappointed because I still had no ammunition to load my normal disappointment gun, and I wasn’t used to that. He had amazing taste, great artwork, and true mid-century furniture.

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